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Divorce Blog

To Trust or Not to Trust?

By Karen Stewart

In some ways, this word trust has become overused and underestimated. To truly trust means to unconditionally love and to be completely vulnerable. Perhaps it can be concluded that if you totally trust, you can get hurt and, let’s face it, nobody wants to get hurt. Some have even gone as far as to take the word “trust” out of their vocabulary. In contrast, however, not trusting results in a piece of unfulfilled love and potential. Practically speaking, the true essence of trust has been lost. In our society, today can we really trust? We are bombarded with deceiving advertisements, camouflaged politicians, naysayers, and empty promises. This epidemic has hit and damaged the core foundation of what our society is built on – families and relationships.

Relationships end on a daily basis because of broken trust. Broken trust is really one person not meeting the expectations of the other person. I trusted you and you did “X” so, therefore, I can no longer trust you. Here in lies the irony. For trust to be given, you must trust yourself first. You must know that at a deep level you really cannot be hurt; that your ability to unconditionally love protects you from being hurt. Taking the time for thoughtful introspection and connecting with our heart vs. our head is a great place to start. Knowing who you are, what matters to you and how you envision your life, will open your heart to trust and protect you at the same time.

Man WhisperingWhen trust has been lost and there is no way to reopen your heart, move on. Put aside the word trust for the short term, deal with the resolution of issues and get past it as soon as you can. Allow yourself time to reconnect with your heart and learn from the experience. Do not make the mistake of putting up a wall against moving forward. For only in the place of unconditional love and vulnerability can you find true happiness?