B.Z. - Client
"We are so fortunate to live in a society whereby we do have choices especially when it involves children and the safety of them."
L.S. - Client
"Thanks for helping us to keep things civil during the rough times so that we could end up at this place. We are very thankful to have this second chance."
G.L. - Client
"Thanks for your work with us, you did a masterful job getting us through the issues without either of us walking out. At the end, I do think our resolution is fair for both parties."
B.L. - Client
"Other than financially – my divorce is picture perfect – no kid visitation rules – you had a lot to do with that and I thank you."
K. Y. - Client
"I spoke to my ex-husband on the phone the other night on what would have been our 10th wedding anniversary. Our conversation was authentic and completely loving. Thank you to Fairway Divorce for attaining a truthful and mindful division of our lives."
B. C. - Your City Interview Dec 12, 2006
"My specific goal was to try and get it done as quickly as possible and as painlessly as possible. I had got my first legal bill for an hour and a half of time and it was over five hundred dollars and realized maybe I should look at other options."
J. V. - Client
“Thank you for all your support. You are such a genuine human being. God bless you and give you the strength you deserve to help others as you helped me.”
L. D. - Client
“You guys are great – I would recommend you to anybody”
M.A. - Client
"Thanks for all of your help and support. I am so thankful that we chose your firm to help us through this difficult time and I am always recommending you to others that I meet."
B. L. - Client
"You are the first ray of sunshine I have had since this thing started..."
Can two parents vacation together after a separation? Yes, but you can only do this if you and your former spouse get along really well and have learned to respect each other’s boundaries and different parenting styles. This arrangement is not one to be taken lightly. For many separated couples, there may be some “feelings”still lingering, as well as some existing resentment from the former union. If there are any of these issues in the picture, it is best to plan stay away from joint vocations.
There are however, some benefits to vacationing together. It can save money, make the kids happy and give you another adult to visit with. However, even if you and your former spouse do have mutual respect for each other this is not a decision to make lightly. Couples parent differently and when they are living apart, their parenting ethics are even more apparent. Therefore, in order to make this work you would need to set out the following in advance:
Money issues - who pays for what? Negotiate a fair plan for all finances related to the trip well in advance of making any reservations.
What are some of the other options for dealing with our home in our divorce/separation when selling it is not an option because it either will not sell or we would have to sell at such a loss that it simply would be financially unwise?
What to do with your house during divorce/separation?
Do we have to hold off on our divorce agreement until we can figure out what to do with the house?
The problem may couples are faced with is what to do with their home. For most North American families, their matrimonial home is the largest asset they have and so at the time of divorce, it needs to be dealt with. Given the current economy we are required to think out of the box with regards to different options. Consider just a few:
Sell it
Certainly there is no harm in getting a real estate agent to list it and see what happens. It is wise to work with your financial advisor to consider what the outcome would be at different prices so that when and if you are made an offer you know whether it is acceptable or not. When working out the details of your “agreement” and assuming that your house has not yet sold you can incorporate a number of “what ifs” in your agreement. What if it does not sell then…….. What will be the lowest price you will sell it for……………….. What if you cannot sell it then ………..
You do not need to hold off on your divorce just because you do not know the exact outcome of your home. Just simply address all the “what ifs”.
The answer is YES! When you are facing life’s challenges, divorce being one of them, we can either play the victim or take 100% responsibility and be accountable. It is in your power to choose.
Playing the victim and laying the foundation for a disempowering future sounds like:
• It is their fault
• They did this to our family/life
• We would not be here if it was not for what they did
• He/she had an affair so what does that have to do with me – they did it to me
• I will never have enough money
• The kids are now going to have to suffer and all because of him/he
• I had no choice but to hire a tough attorney because I had to make sure my rights were taken care of
• My friends and family warn me to get the best attorney I can or else….
• He/she is going to try and destroy me
• All my friends agree that he/she is a jerk and I am better off without them
• My children are going to suffer big time – they will have less and therefore will not be as happy
1. Avoid at all costs hiring lawyers that claim they are going to fight for a “win” for you. There is no such thing as divorce in the traditional system is a zero sum game. There are no winners.
2. Never file affidavits about your spouse in the courts that claim to be “fact” but are filled with “perception.” This will destroy relationships forever and cause huge unnecessary pain and suffering. Consider some of the famous cases that learned the hard way; the Baldwins, Paul McCartney, the Trumps, Brittany Spears and many more. I am sure you can certainly add to the list.
3. Avoid allowing the courts to decide who will get the children. That destroys everyone and is the most disempowering experience possible.
4. Never think that hiring a lawyer is taking control. It is the opposite as you give up control of your money, time and outcomes.
5. Do not create chaos by being over reactive. Be proactive with a strategy that works. Work with financial experts and negotiators.
We know that “money” can be one of the biggest stressors for a couple. So given the current state of the economy, are we going to see more divorces?
It is an interesting question and I believe the answer is going to be “yes.” Those who have decided to get a divorce are going to and should do everything they can to do it in a way that does not further destroy their net worth.
The very nature of the traditional system's adversarial approach allows children and money to be used as bargaining chips. Parents do not intentionally use their children as pawns but regardless of intention, that is exactly what happens. There is usually a tug-of-war, known as position bargaining, over money and/or children.
When spouses feel cornered, they come out fighting - and will use whatever ammunition is available. The more threatened they feel, the more powerful the ammunition they use. The two areas where power is exercised in a divorce surround money and children. The person who has more control over money will use money, and the person who has more control over the children will use the children. It's commonplace and even expected in a traditional divorce; parties engage in this tug-of-war to achieve what they call ‘victory'.
Less than a year following Fairway Divorce Solutions’ rapid Canadian expansion, I am excited to announce that as of tomorrow, we begin franchising our divorce solutions in the U.S.!
People from across North America, who are affected by divorce, have been calling us seeking our “#1 alternative way to divorce”, and now we will offer our business model and services to a location near you.
Helping us bring Fairway Divorce Solutions® to major centers across the country is Franchise Foundry, a strategic investment partner of franchise concepts based out of Salt Lake City, Utah. Through this partnership, we will be delivering 70 new Fairway Divorce Solutions franchises throughout the U.S. over the next three years.
There are only two important matters in divorce: money and children. So what is all the talk about “my legal rights”? Do they matter? Of course they do. But it makes sense to focus on sound financial decisions that ensure a positive and financially secure future, and to develop a cooperative co-parenting plan.
You are concerned with being treated fairly. Being treated fairly is about empowered decision-making – not a battle for your legal rights. In divorce, being empowered means that you understand the law and your rights under the law, and you understand the financial implications of various options. Being empowered also means that you are in a position to develop the best possible parenting plan for yourself and your children.
Most people simply want to work out the divorce details and move on. They need a process that keeps emotions from playing havoc with their decision-making ability, a process that ensures the outcomes will be fair.
Now more than ever, divorce and extended families have become the norm. While common, planning for the holidays between separated families can be a major undertaking.
For adults whose parents are divorced, this means scheduling celebrations with each parent - separately. And if by happenstance your situation is just like Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon in their new comedy Four Christmases, then that means that you have to plan for four holiday celebrations - two between your divorced parents and two between your significant other's divorced parents.
The high number of divorces today has created a fertile feeding ground for the legal profession, and while lawyers are certainly eating well, there are more losers than winners among the embattled participants.
Divorce has become lucrative for the legal community. Spurred on by ambitious legal beagles, they challenge each client's grant for child care and custody, division of property and assets, and ongoing financial support. By the time divorce is settled, the process is extremely adversarial. For most couples, court is a blunt instrument unable to deal elegantly with resolving the intricate, personal and emotional issues surrounding the dissolution of a relationship. Emotions run high and trust is low - a perfect combination for a fiery battle.
